Tag Archives: children born in captivity

When the truth is bitter: the story of a mother who long awaited to be reunited with her son

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JRP and WAN meets with Ker Kal Kwero and family members to discuss the case. Photo by Joyce Abalo/JRP
JRP and WAN meets with Ker Kal Kwero and family members to discuss the case. Photo by Joyce Abalo/JRP

The story of Okello*

When the truth is bitter: the story of a mother who long awaited to be reunited with her son

Okello, the son of a well-known LRA commander, was born in captivity during the LRA conflict. When he managed to escape from captivity he was still very young and escaped with a group of other children born in captivity, leaving his mother behind. Whilst Okello sought refuge in Rachele rehabilitation centre, a team of NGO agencies attempted to search for his maternal and paternal family. The search ended in NGO agencies finding what they thought was the biological maternal family of Okello and handed the child over to them for them to care of him. What later transpired was that there had been confusion concerning the mothers name, as both the biological mother of Okello and the daughter of the family caring for Okello had both been called Nancy*. Therefore, like many other cases of children who returned from captivity, Okello was not being cared for by his true family.

Without knowing the true identity of the child, the family he was given to continued to raise him. At this time, Evelyn, leader of WAN and a member of the JRP team, knew Nancy, the biological mother, from her time in captivity and came to believe that Okello was being taken care of by a family other than his own. Evelyn explained: “when I met with Okello some years back while I was still for studying on an adult literacy course. Okello told me he missed his mother and brother Banya so much that when he started to think about them he could not study well.” That was when Evelyn took a step to see that Okello privately met the mother. In 2014, Evelyn arranged for Okello and Nancy, the perceived biological mother, to meet at the JRP office. It was noted by those attending that both the mother and child instantly knew that they were matched correctly, as Okello immediately asked his mother about his brother, Banya – something only the true son would have been able to say. However, despite this meeting, Evelyn did not know how to tell this news to the grandmother of the child, as she knew how devastating it would be.

A few years passed and in this period the grandmother of the family that had originally taken Okello in had passed on. This news came to the attention of the school when the term finished and Okello was left at the school with no one to pick him up. His schooling, and that of many of the father’s other children, at that time was being funded by a sponsor organisation and so this organisation took it upon themselves to email his sponsor, a Belgian citizen, to explain the problem. Due to difficulties in arranging adoption, the same sponsor asked the deputy head teacher of Gulu Public Primary School to care for Okello and provided her with the monetary means to do so. When this issue arose, Evelyn communicated with the sponsor organisation that she believed the mother had actually returned from captivity and did not belong to the family who originally took care of Okello. Nancy, the friend of Evelyn who she believed was the real mother, was not sure whether Okello was alive or not.

When JRP and WAN came to hear of the worsening situation for Okello, they mobilised various important people involved in this situation for two dialogues to discuss and attempt to resolve this issue. The first meeting, chaired by JRP and WAN, brought together the prime minister of Acholi Ker kal Kwaro (a local cultural institution), Nancy Abalo (the lady claiming she was Okello’s mother), the benefactor that was supporting Okello in school and the elderly woman who claimed Okello was a grandchild of the family. During the meeting, the prime minister of Ker Kal Kwero asked Nancy Abalo to present the reasons as to why she claims that Okello is her son.  With tears rolling from her eyes she said:

‘‘first of all, I did not die, I am alive. When the government soldiers attacked, I had already left that area, but my son was with another group that escaped and returned back home. My son, while in captivity, developed a disease that affected all the finger nails, and all were wounded. The finger nails grew back apart from one fingernail that did not grow back well, and that is a sign that I can use to identify my son. Besides, he knows his brother because by the time my son had been separated from me, his younger brother called Banya was already around and he loved him so much.’’

A member of the sponsor organisation said that in the process of seeking for the truth about Okello’s true mother, the Belgian sponsor had organised for a DNA test to be taken for both Okello and the mother. The member said: ‘‘I am pleased to inform that I have the copy of the DNA results which I shall hand over to the prime minister of Ker Kal Kwaro. These results stated clearly that Nancy Abalo is the biological mother of Okello – there is no doubt about it.”

Before the DNA test results were released, the member of Sponsor Children Uganda explained that at first, they thought that Nancy was not the biological mother of Okello. This was believed because the women who were close to Okello’s mother while in captivity said that Nancy had been killed by a bomb that had been thrown by the government soldiers, who even covered her body, confirming that she was dead.

A beautiful moment happened when one of the women claiming that Okello was not a son to Nancy arrived. She arrived just as the DNA results were being presented to the prime minister. On seeing that Nancy was alive she was completely shocked and asked, “where have you been that I could not see you?” She was overwhelmed with guilt and asked for forgiveness from Okello’s mother: “I am sorry for all that I said. I thought you had passed on. But now that you are here and alive, it is better for Okello that he lives with his biological mother, so that a bond may be built between them and they may feel the love each other missed.” The prime minister then resolved that a step needed to be taken so that Okello is given to his biological mother. The mother was full of joy and proclaimed, “I will carry my son on my back however old he is and give him all the love a mother can give her child.”

The second meeting held by JRP and WAN to discuss the issue further brought together members of both the paternal and maternal side of Okello, the family claiming to be related to Okello, the deputy head teacher of Gulu Public primary school and the Prime Minister of Ker Kal Kwero. In addressing the group, the prime minster said: “In Acholi culture it is not allowed for a different person to force and claim custody of a blood which is not theirs. Therefore, the reason the meeting was held was to ensure that Okello gets to know who his biological mother is and where he can finally call home.”

Once the Prime Minister confirmed that the DNA test showed the 99.99% likelihood of Nancy Abalo being the biological mother of Okello, Okot* a member from the family claiming Okello, narrated how he got to know Okello. He said:

“Okello is my nephew, a son to my sister Aciro Nancy* who was abducted from Koch Amar in 1988 and to this date has not returned. In 2004, I was approached by a team of members from Rachele rehabilitation Centre who came to my carpentry work place and told me of a child called Okello a son to Nancy. They said that I should take over the responsibility for caring for Okello. I took the news positively and spoke to my late mother. Together we organized various cultural procedures like ‘Nyono tong gweno’ (stepping on an egg before entering the home) and Okello was welcomed home.”

Despite the DNA test results, Okot went ahead and asked Nancy Abalo the name of her clan and its location, saying that she probably changed her name whilst in captivity. Despite this allegation, Nancy’s mother was present to prove that Nancy Abalo was not related to Okot – something that was clear just based on resemblance. Nancy’s mother said: “Nancy Abalo is my daughter and the name Nancy Abalo was given by me. She was abducted but returned. When she returned, I found her with two children, but she told me that her other son went missing. I am happy that her missing son is what we are discussing today because for so long she has been craving to meet him again.”

A paternal uncle to Okello explained, “my brother was abducted and at one point passed via home and said he had wives and children. I told him to return home with the wives and children so that he could start taking care of them, but he said his mission was not done yet. Therefore, I acknowledge that my brother has children, although some we don’t know their whereabouts. Okello is one of them and I believe the DNA test result. Although it is my first time to meet Nancy Abalo, I believe wholeheartedly that Okello belongs to her. A mother knows who her child is and who the father is.”

The uncle showed sincere sorrow and pain for the mistreatment of the children of his brother. He elaborated this by explaining how one of his brother’s children, whose mother comes from Pabbo, walked on foot to the paternal home due to mistreatment. He said, “we had to flee away from Patiko due to continuous attack by the government soldiers for where our brother was. My mother was severely beaten by the government soldiers because of my brother.” As he recounted the story he broke down in tears. He noted that, “it will be very important if these children are allowed to know their paternal family members, even if they are not able to stay with us due to financial difficulties. Unfortunately, we cannot take care of them all. However, we ask that those in scholarships will continue to be supported.” Later in the meeting, the paternal grandmother to Okello said, “I am happy to hear that I have grandchildren and I wish to see them while I am still alive. Even though my son is dead, I am happy that I can see his image through his children.”

The prime minster later explained that the Acholi Ker Kal Kwaro is not a court place to pronounce judgments. Instead, it listens to the situation of the people and helps bring forward resolutions to matters. The suggestions given by the Acholi Ker Kal Kwaro were as follows:

  • Nancy the mother to Okello has full rights to know, see, and talk to the child
  • As per Acholi culture, it is the role of the paternal side of Okello to care for the children
  • Unity is needed since Okello has a bond with both his biological parents and the families that took care of him
  • Plans to organise Okello and the other brothers to be taken home to both the maternal and paternal side

Therefore, it was resolved that everyone present would go and meet Okello at the home of the deputy head teacher. When the trip took place, Okello was told who his biological mother and paternal family were. To the dismay of many, Okello did not accept Nancy as his biological mother, saying, “I don’t know any Nancy Abalo, I only know Aciro Nancy, and my uncle Okot.” This caused Nancy Abalo a lot of pain and she broke down in tears. She later said to Evelyn, “my child has been brain washed.” When she had previously met Okello, he had been happy to meet her. She was consoled by Evelyn and was encouraged to never to give up. For Nancy Abalo, this day was full of mixed emotions: sadness after not being accepted by her son, but also happiness and joy after as she was able to see her son again after such a long time. Therefore, despite the fact that Nancy was denied by her son, she promised to always come and see him with his brothers, since they will also be enrolled under the same sponsorship that Okello is benefiting from.

The case of Okello highlights the many complexities of the LRA conflict. Nearly every family was impacted heavily by the conflict and in trying to deal with the consequences it can be extremely difficult. It is not rare that children who returned from captivity were reunited with a family other than their biological family, and in some cases, children were even taken in to be used as workers or housemaids. Therefore, WAN and JRP, with the help of cultural institutions, seeks to aid in reintegrating children born in captivity with their biological family, so a sense of identity and belonging may be reinstated and for the wellbeing of the child to be a focus for all involved.

*The names of those involved have been changed so that their identity may be preserved

Building a future together: two families joining hands to change the lives of those who experienced LRA captivity

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Maternal and paternal family of child born from captivity laugh and share stories together. Photo by Patrick Odong/JRP
Maternal and paternal family of child born from captivity laugh and share stories together. Photo by Patrick Odong/JRP

The maternal and paternal family of a child born from captivity have joined hands to brighten their futures together through the child reintegration programme. 

In 2016, JRP and WAN supported one mother through the child reintegration project, in which her child who was born in captivity was reunited with their paternal home. After being contacted by the mother to express her gratitude for the team and the project, JRP conducted a follow-up visit with the mother to the paternal family in Palaro parish, Odek sub-county, to see how the families were working together.

The happiness and love shown by the two families for each other was greatly reflected in the stories told. The mother told JRP how the families had combined their efforts and resources to support the child at school and ensure the child has a bright future. The paternal family has not only given the mother a plot of their ancestral land to plough, but has identified a strategic piece of their land in the centre of Odek for the mother to build a business. By generously giving land and helping her to build a business and home in Odek, they ensure that she is close to the child and the family. The paternal family opened their arms to her other children and proclaimed that together they will join hands together to build a strong future for her and her children.

This story sheds light on how families across war-torn communities are supporting each other in life after the LRA conflict. Often those who return from captivity are faced with stigmatisation and rejection from their local communities. By providing a platform for these families to engage in dialogue and discussion over their experiences, hopes and interests for those children born in captivity, JRP hopes to bring light to the lives of many conflict survivors.

 

“I want to ask, why are you writing this?” – Documenting the experiences of children born into LRA captivity

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We Are All the Same-Beth Stewart

JRP’s 23rd Field Note, We Are All the Same: Experiences of children born into LRA captivity documents the views, experiences and hopes of 29 children living in the urban centre of Gulu over the course of a three year project. In this blog, researcher Beth W. Stewart reflects on the process and the lessons learned from the children that participated.

“I want to ask, why are you writing this?”

Every year the same boy asked us this same question. To my research assistant and I, the reason seems obvious: children born into the LRA, like this boy, have unique identities, experiences, and needs that are both valuable to society to understand and necessary to address. But to this boy, and the other children like him, they are just children. They laugh, love, play, learn, and dream just like everyone else. Children are children, no matter where they come from, no matter who their fathers are. And yet, there are aspects of their lives that are unquestionably unique and undoubtedly shaped by their pasts and identities. Doing a long term project with the same group of children has provided a rare and intimate look into the children’s special lives revealing why we should care about them.

The project that informed this Field Note began in 2011 after many mothers who had children born in LRA captivity repeatedly requested attention for their children. They wanted to raise awareness of their children’s needs and fight the stigma they faced. Once the project began, JRP became the safe space where the children gathered, away from prying eyes and ears. It became the one place in their lives where everyone could be open about that part of themselves, about their pasts and identities that they normally had to keep secret to avoid stigma. Also significant to the children, JRP became synonymous with a place for play. Through play and open sharing, the children made important new friends. For years now, the children have supported each other in numerous ways, from listening when times got hard to sharing their bed when the other had none. The children, who are now quickly becoming adults, continue to meet and support each other almost five years on.

An exceptional aspect of the project is not only the connections made between the participants, but also the trust and care that grew between the participants and the researchers. It’s common for research projects to begin then leave shortly thereafter, especially in war-affected areas. But this project has persisted, resulting in meaningful relationships and giving the researchers important insight into the more nuanced and vulnerable dynamics of the children’s lives. The project’s research assistant, Aloyo Proscovia, has been the crux of the project and an always caring figure in the children’s lives. This consistency is evidenced in the comfort and ease of the children that participated and also in the depth of knowledge they shared. It’s also worth noting that for the researchers, building relationships with each of these children has been an enjoyable and deeply moving process – these are remarkable children, full of laughter with so much to say.

It is difficult, however, to watch as the children’s pasts follow them into their adult lives. As northern Uganda moves further away from its experience of active war, the ramifications continue to be lived each day. The case of children born into the LRA challenges us to question if a war is ever truly over. Without measures to address their needs and rights, the violence of the war continues. This Field Note presents the children’s contributions toward educating us (readers), their communities, and their leaders about what remains to be done for northern Uganda to transition to peace. As one girl put it: “We have to be treated equally, in other words by treating us well by loving us the same way like the other children.”

Beth W. Stewart is a a PhD Candidate at the University of British Columbia.

We Are All The Same: Experiences of children born into LRA captivity

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We Are All The Same: Experiences of children born into LRA captivity
We Are All The Same: Experiences of children born into LRA captivity

Children born into the captivity of the Lord’s Resistance Army (LRA) remain a largely neglected and overlooked child survivor population. The children who successfully transitioned out of the LRA exist on the margins of their society, stigmatised and with limited life opportunities. This field note offers a review of the lives of 29 such children living in the urban centre of Gulu town, drawn from a three-year project documenting their lives. While the children have developed strategies to conceal their true identities, this report determines ways to support their future well-being, while simultaneously contributing to the reconciliation process of their communities.

The research findings include:

The children face significant stigma from communities, peers, and even at times from family members, including violent abuse from stepfathers, so they employ strategies to keep their identities secret. Those whose fathers are top commanders still at-large fear for their safety if their fathers are captured. Other children do not know their lineages and long to connect. All the mothers find it difficult to tell them the realities of their identities. Despite such stigma and uncertain identities, the children insist they are the same as other children.

Support from family members is vital to their sense of well-being, especially with their mothers whom they love deeply. Many children lost siblings in the bush.

Many children live with memories and trauma. They remember the violence from the bush and feel the loss of a parent, or of both parents. Remembering is triggered by sadness resulting from quarrelling, beatings, or sickness. For some, their memories are physically embodied and manifest as spiritual problems, or psychosis. All the children who remember employ strategies to forget.

Religion is important in the children’s lives and prayer offers them a form of meditation to help them quiet their minds, while church provides them with a welcoming place to be among friends.

Children are unlikely to access their land inheritances, and they feel hopeless.

The children dream of a bright future for themselves, but the layering of their unique hardships on top of the significant poverty they live in makes that unlikely.

The children found the project to be transformative. The participatory action research methodology and opportunity to play enabled deep friendships to develop while the children learned about themselves, their mothers, and how to manage their identities and challenge intergenerational problems.

A number of the children’s rights have been violated and require redress. They should be active agents in processes of transitional justice.

Important recommendations:

  1. Documentation of children born into LRA captivity must continue and should include records of children who died.
  2. Broad community sensitisation initiatives must be implemented.
  3. The children must be appropriately engaged to identify needs and peer support activities such as this project should be expanded across the region.
  4. Mothers must be empowered with livelihood skills and grants.
  5. Fathers must be held accountable for support of their children.
  6. The government must support the children so they grow into productive citizens

Download this Field Note here (pdf): We Are All The Same – Experiences of children born into LRA captivity 2015-12-22

 

Oduru (Alarm): A Poem by the Women’s Advocacy Network, 8 March 2012

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Oduru (Alarm)
A Poem by the Women’s Advocacy Network for International Women’s Day 2012
PDF

This year, as we join the world in celebration of International Women’s Day, the Justice and Reconciliation Project (JRP) wishes to emphasize the unique peace, justice and reconciliation challenges faces women survivors of armed conflict. In line with this year’s theme, “Connecting girls, inspiring futures,” a member of the Women’s Advocacy Network (WAN)—a JRP-supported forum for conflict-affected women to undertake gender justice advocacy—has prepared a poem that highlights some of the issues facing formerly-abducted women and the need for stakeholders and communities to listen to women’s calls for justice.

Wululu Wululu Wululu
Lutuwa  oduru  yang ka okok lwak  ringo kama oduru okok  iye do
Piny dong oto
Piny dong oto ada

Wa lworo piny calo lee tim malworo got
Wa lworo piny kwe
Wa lworo Wa lworo Wa lworo

Oduru ki wango doo
Oduru pek
Oduru lit
Oduru longo

Aneno tungi ki tungi
Mutu piny mede ameda
Gwoko ajula dong odoko tek
Lutino ma pe wa yube pire
Anyim gi tika bibedo tye
Anyim gi binen awene

Lweny Lweny Lweny
Lweny, kono yang wangeyo gang pa meni kono ber
Kadi obed kumeno kwo pud yube

Wun lwak wun gamente, wun NGOs, wun lutela wa
Wucung kwed wa
Wu pee cing wa
Wuwiny koko wa
Wulok kwed wa

Mon obedo guti
Wu nyut it wa maa
Wek wabed calo dano adana
Wek anyim wa obed maleng
Wawek tim alany
Wek oduru ogik koko

Poem Explanation by the Authors
The poem was written by members of the Women’s Advocacy Network (WAN). Cognizant that the war in northern Uganda affected us, the war-affected women, in various ways, we are calling for justice, healing and reconciliation.

In this poem, we note the ongoing challenges we face, such as the quest for reparations and other forms of redress from various stakeholders, which we compare to a wild animal wondering about the mountains. We also note the challenges in raising children we were not prepared to have (children born in captivity, ajula), whose futures are blurred and who lack basic needs, a cultural identity and access to land.

The poem’s title, Oduru, means raising an alarm. In the past when one would hear a person alarming, he or she would know there was a problem and in turn run to the source of the cry. In this context, we believe that what befell us during the war merits attention, and we hope in hearing our calls you too will run to our side.

As we celebrate International Women’s Day 2012, we call upon stakeholders to respond to our cries for justice, healing and reconciliation for ourselves and our children. Despite the challenges we face, we are hopeful that our futures and that of our children can be bright if you listen and respond to our oduru.

About WAN
The Women’s Advocacy Network (WAN) is a forum for war-affected women to advocate for justice, acknowledgment and accountability for gender-based violations inflicted during war. It was formed in May 2011 with support from JRP and aims to empower women survivors to participate in post-conflict policy debates in Uganda and to engage grassroots communities in gendered discussions on reintegration and reconciliation. The WAN currently comprises of 9 women’s groups from Acholi sub-regions, with plans to expand to Teso, West Nile and Lango in 2012. The WAN meets quarterly to discuss common issues, including the need for compensation and other forms of reparation, the rights of children born of forced marriage in LRA captivity and strategies to end social stigma by communities.

About JRP
The Justice and Reconciliation Project (JRP) promotes locally sensitive and sustainable peace in Africa’s Great Lakes region by focusing on the active involvement of grassroots communities in local-level transitional justice. To learn more about JRP’s work, please visit www.justiceandreconciliation.com. For comments related to this poem, please email info@justiceandreconciliation.com.

Click here for the PDF.

Young women perform traditional dances during an event in Gulu district, 2010

Pursuing Justice for Women and Children in Northern Uganda: Observations from the field

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Young women perform traditional dances during an event in Gulu district, 2010
Young women perform traditional dances during an event in Gulu district, 2010

Initiatives to end violence often focus on ‘silencing the gun’ and bringing home largely male combatants. As a result, girls and women who were captured, raped, and forced into marriage and childbearing by armed groups remain largely unacknowledged and ignored. In this statement, we focus on the unique justice and reconciliation issues facing young mothers and their children in northern Uganda who have returned from captivity. We offer specific recommendations to ensure their holistic well-being and successful reintegration into society.

To access the statement, click here.

Planning and Budgeting for the Well-Being of the Child: Statement on considerations for peace, justice and reconciliation

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A girl participates in the Gulu district Day of the African Child celebrations, 2010
A girl participates in the Gulu district Day of the African Child celebrations, 2010

 

This year, as we join Africa in celebration of the Day of the African Child (DAC), JRP wishes to emphasis the need to reflect on the unique peace, justice and reconciliation issues hindering the well-being of children affected by conflict. In line with this year’s theme, we offer specific recommendations for planning and budgeting for the well-being of children affected by conflict, with critical reflections on the situation of children in northern Uganda and lessons for other contexts.

To access the statement, click here

Young Mothers, Marriage and Reintegration, FN II

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This issue of Field Notes focuses on young mothers who have returned from the captivity of the Lord’s Resistance Army (LRA). Mothers are a social group that has not figured widely in the justice, reintegration or reconciliation debate in northern Uganda. Yet a number of justice related concerns were raised by young mothers during the course of JRP research, suggesting the urgent need for a more forward-thinking approach at the Juba Peace Talks.

To stimulate this discussion, the Field Note focuses on the following questions: a) What are the cultural norms, beliefs and practices around marriage in Acholi-land, and how have these been affected by the conflict?; b) What implications have abduction, forced soldiering and forced marriage had on the practice of marriage for young mothers who are no longer in captivity?; c)What are the possible justice and reconciliation issues policy makers need to be aware of and address in the current peace process?

To access the report, click here.